I found my old collection of fortune cookie fortunes.
Most are from cookies opened at Chinese dinners with family and friends, some dating back into the '90s. I started collecting them when I was a little girl, after deciding that it was so careless to throw away one's own destiny (personalized, foretold!) in the trashcan by the buffet line. Soon other people began bringing me their fortunes, too, in little pinches of 5 or 6, from meals I hadn't even attended. Here are some of the best: